Two Air is Human: An Exercise in Homonyms

There was a sale on sails, I could get one for my craft.

I'll walk down the aisle and sail to an isle, at least it's not a raft.

I said to the sheep running the shop, "I want to get two of those, too"

"You know I've got two ewes to feed, would you buy a nice paddle made of yew?"

I said "I'm just a buyer, don't you belong in a byre?" I told the sheep that day

I said "I might as well buy and say bye" and I was on my way.

Well I done crashed through a pane of glass, and boy was I in pain,

It was such a scene, and I was seen in a bit of trouble again.

So then a seven toed toad hopped up and said "Sir, do you need your boat towed?"

So I said "Yes, can you drop me off at the river?" and we rode down the road.

"Say there sonny, it looks quite sunny"   

"You're driving too fast in your car!"

"Well, I got one eye on the road"

"Look, there's a cop! Are you even thinking about our safety?"

"That's not a state trooper, he's just a plain ol' trouper!"

"Dear heavens! You almost hit a buck and sent it deer heaven!"

"Say, is that hair dye?"

"I think we're gonna die!"

So that toad nearly earned us a couple of urns, I mean, he was a toad

But he would be missed as he drove into the mist, and back onto the road.

I started to whistle a tune from some famous 'toon about boats and mouse

I may sound like I'm rapping, but really I'm just wrapping up this story, and I sailed to my house.

I prayed dearly to the sky, so that I wouldn't be preyed upon by a hungry crocodile,

I then thought, "I'll just give him a flower, ask him for a cup of flour" and we'd be pals for a while.

Now I have told you a story, but I've halved the story, as it could go on for a while.

But I'll be back in a while, walkin' down the aisle, and I'll tell you another tale in this goofy style.